Plans (Nothing)


Pic of the day:  Crucifixion by Josse Lieferinxe

_______________________________

Midway upon the journey of our life
I found myself within a forest dark,
For the straight-forward pathway had been lost.

Ah me! how hard a thing it is to say
What was this forest savage, rough, and stern,
Which in the very thought renews the fear.

Dante Alighieri, Inferno, Canto 1, lines 1-6

_______________________________

I have plans.

The  plan is to go to sleep early, and wake up early to go to work.  I plan on busting my ass at work, proving my worth to the powers that be.

I expect I’ll get home early enough to run 5.8 or so miles tomorrow evening, even though it’ll be over 90 degrees when I do so.

There should be some kind of news from the people at one of the places I sent a resume to yesterday.  I’ll be seeing a number of people from that company around my job tomorrow. With any luck this can turn into a full time permanent job.  Crossing fingers on this one.

I plan on heading to my mother’s house on Friday and doing some work there, seeing how I have the day off.  The place needs a little bit of sprucing up that only I can do.  Well, OK there are other people who can, but only I am in a position to do so currently.  6 of one, half a dozen of the other.

Hoping that I can have some kind of quiet and happy wedding anniversary celebration on Saturday.  It’ll be 5 years.  Amazing how fast time goes when the world is going haywire around you.

I plan on eventually having a full time job, with benefits sometime in the future, the sooner the better.  If the company that I sent the resume into yesterday that I’ll be seeing around doesn’t do it for me, hire me, then someone else will.  Can’t stay working freelance forever.  That would suck.

I have not read Dante’s Divine Comedy in years.  I may pick the book up again in the near future.

The future…

I don’t know why I feel so damned despondent about it at the moment.  But I do.  Not enough money in the bank, no way to save money, never working enough, not paid often enough.  I want to buy my wife something for our wedding anniversary and dammit right now I can’t afford a damn thing.  It leaves a bitter taste in my mouth that does not wash out, always stays there.

Lack of funds, lack of stability at work, lack of a future.  My life is defined by the things I lack.  Yet I work hard, give everything I have to make ends meet.  Do all I can, and still I am unfulfilled.  Still my life is filled with holes that I cannot fill.

I want better, but I don’t know how to get it.  I will someday, and that day will be truly sweet, but until then…

Nothing.

Hail nothing.  Full of nothing. Nothing is with thee.

_______________________________

Pic of the day, part ii:  Descent from the Cross by Jean-Baptiste Jouvenet

__________________________

So bitter is it, death is little more;
But of the good to treat, which there I found,
Speak will I of the other things I saw there.

I cannot well repeat how there I entered,
So full was I of slumber at the moment
In which I had abandoned the true way.

Dante Alighieri, Inferno, Canto 1, lines 7-12

___________________________

That’s it from here, America.  G’night.

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s